In the last trimester of pregnancy I unexpectedly lost a work contract I depended on.
Strange things began to happen physically and I ended up being monitored for potential prenatal heart complications. Near the very end I was told my amniotic fluid may get low and to be prepared for induction. I felt like I was crawling up a steep mountain those last few weeks. I wouldn’t trade anything for my journey right now. And
my heart is with those of you traversing any of this through a pandemic.
Within my challenges I had an excellent team of midwives, a doula, and birth educator who listened to and cared for me. Ultimately my delivery was empowering and life changing in 108 positive ways. I hope the same thing for those of you birthing during this time. May your process bring healing to you, your lineage, and legacy.
We stayed in the house for the first few months of my son’s life. I’m a “country” mama and rarely took my baby out or “showed” him when he was still wet, new, and pink. I taught yoga or worked at night and spent my day holding my son so close it felt like we were breathing each other.
My breath is with those breathing into new life through the thick air of right now.
Then the anxiety started. Postpartum. During those days I could hear a cough/ sneeze miles away and see clouds of germs descending from 6,000 feet above. Yes, the way my anxiety worked, this was the complete truth in my mind and I battled with it. Even with therapy, it was still a fight. My warrior spirit is with those who are clawing through the messy parts of postpartum that go unspoken, buried in shame, and unacknowledged. I honor that you are fighting all of this during a global war. You deserve for us all to be your army.
Expectant and new mothers, four years ago I was you.
and today I am thinking of you.
I offer you this prayer:
May The Mother of all protect and guide you safely through labor and birth.
May those born this season of this year come in peace and health.
May The Mother of Grace carry you and your baby into a brighter day.
May The Mother of Grace hold us all.